First dates can feel like job interviews sometimes — what with picking out the right outfit to wear, making sure you say the right things, and trying to keep your vibes good and your spirits up and as with job interviews, it’s important to go into a first date with confidence.

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Sometimes the best way to ease first date jitters is to go to your version of Cheers — where everybody knows your name (or at least, your face.) By going to a familiar location, you’re introducing a sense of comfort into your date, almost as if you were going on a date at your home. And if you know the person and you’re most comfortable at home cooking instead of going out, then go ahead and invite them to your place for dinner. Writer/actress Amy Sedaris does that, and you can’t go wrong by her. Be aware though that your date could misinterpret this as “come to my place for sex”, so if you’re not going for that, pick a neutral but well-known place .

Don’t hold yourself up to a standard of perfection. Trying to remind yourself to be the most witty,  attractive, intelligent, ten out of ten will most likely cause you to be nervous. It’s impossible to get a second or third date with the right partner when you’re trying to be chameleon and become what you think he’s looking for. Instead, show up as your authentic, real-deal self. Your date can sense your nerves whether you know it or not, because trying to fit into someone else’s box can cause you to emanate a vibe of “over-eagerness” that will definitely turn off your date.

What’s your advice for having confidence on a first date? Give your comments.

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